Before I start...I would be remiss not to mention Haiti. I hope that you keep them in your prayers! I will give you info on any site that I hear of that has good advice on ways to help them!
Remember yesterday when I told you that there were parties two days in a row at work? Well, yesterday, I did have a few strawberries dipped in the chocolate fountain but nothing major went down and I counted all of my indiscretions. Today, I haven’t even approached the party table though I did see aluminum foil which usually indicates a cake and mustard which usually indicates some sort of pig in a blanket...but...NO MATTER...I’m FINE. Plus, I don’t need pigs in a blanket...I just had a swine flu shot and for some reason that combo creeps me out. I had a granola bar and I gotta save up for trivia tonight which I totally miss by the way...should be a fun time.
Do you all ever feel like you are climbing an uphill battle in your life? I think that was probably a stupid question but there are issues happening in my life where I feel like I’m trying to climb this HUGE mountain and every step I take, a giant rock tumbles down on my face. Do y’all remember the show GUTS on Nickelodeon? The kids would compete and at the end they would climb up this thing called the AgroCrag or something and as they went up these huge foam boulders would fall on them. That’s what I feel like sometimes.
For the most part, my life is mostly unscathed. I have a good job, family and friends but there are two major “mountains” that I am climbing that seem to have no end. I like tasks that I can finish, bills I can pay...little...hills if you will.
First, I have student loans. I don’t know how many of you have this problem and I it seems like I complain about it a lot but it is certainly a mountain in my life that I feel like I may never reach the top. So-I put money on it here and there but for what? I never make progress. It will literally take my whole adult life to pay these things off. The thought of that is such a burden because there is no light at the end of the tunnel.
Another mountain I have which DOES have a light at the end of the tunnel is losing weight. I realize that is the elephant in the room...no pun intended (though I don’t really believe there are unintended puns). I have lost 50 pounds (pending a very scary weigh in at the end of the week) but there is always some sort of event or scale or mirror hurling giant rocks at me from the top-pushing me down. I know life isn’t supposed to be easy and what doesn’t kill us is making us stronger and all that...whatever. I want to enjoy life without worrying that the food or drink I consume will kill me...romantically, mentally, physically...whatever. Not to be cynical, but sometimes people do everything right and they still get sick...so...how do we find motivation?
We look to the future. We look to the deepest truth. I feel happier when I’m healthier. I will get by somehow even when it doesn’t feel like it and I have amazing people on my side.
I apologize for the campy flare this blog has today but that’s where I’m at. I am not going to stop pushing upwards.
” The storm is coming but I don't mind
People are dying, I close my blinds
All that I know is I'm breathing now
I want to change the world
Instead I sleep
I want to believe in more than you and me
But all that I know is I'm breathing
All I can do is keep breathing
All we can do is keep breathing now”
Keep Breathing-Ingrid Michaelson